Are you always comparing yourself to others? Do you foster negative thoughts about yourself? Are your friends constantly berating you, and you can’t seem to cut them off? Do you always worry about other people’s opinions about you? Then, you have low self-esteem, and you need activities that can build your self-esteem.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying these thoughts don’t normally come in once in a while, or you can’t have a little fun with your friends. But when they occur repeatedly, then it is unhealthy. Unfortunately, we might not notice it at first or see it as a big deal, but slowly, we see our confidence begin to dwindle.
Low self-esteem affects our outlook on ourselves and our relationships with others, among other things. We must work on those thoughts and actions. Here we will cover some activities that build self-esteem:
Key Takeaways
- Self-esteem can be defined as the way we see and value ourselves. It is the general perception of our qualities and attributes (physical, mental, social, etc.).
- Your self-esteem is a very important factor in your life. The way you see and carry yourself controls the way you present yourself to the world, how you walk into a room, and how you address your problems.
- Some ways to improve your self-esteem include monitoring critical self-talk, being aware of self-comparison, being mindful of the people in your circle, and performing the act of self-care and self-compassion.
What Is Self-Esteem?
Before we discuss the activities that build self-esteem, let’s see the definition of Self-Esteem. Self-esteem can be defined as the way we see and value ourselves. It is the general perception of our qualities and attributes (physical, mental, social, etc.). It is the trigger to our confidence and communication level. There are 3 types of self-esteem.
1. Overly high Self-esteem
2. Low Self-Esteem
3. Healthy Self-esteem
1. Overly High Self-Esteem :
This set of people has a superiority complex with characters of pride, extravagance, and arrogance. Usually, they criticize others regardless of their faults to feel good about themselves. People with overly high self-esteem pinpoint other people’s flaws and find ways to bring them up now and then.
2. Low Self-Esteem:
People with low self-esteem have an inferiority complex. They worry about what people think of them and value people’s opinions of them above their own, as they are prone to self-doubt. These people find it difficult to accept compliments from other people because they focus on their faults. This set of people believes that everyone is better than them.
3. Healthy Self-Esteem:
They are confident and comfortable in their skin and accept themselves as they are. People with healthy self-esteem are aware of their strengths, flaws, capabilities, and limitations and take themselves as they are. Actually, most of these people do not just wake up with this type of self-esteem, they work for it, they build it. In essence, They intentionally indulge in activities that build self-esteem.
Prioritizing Your Self-Esteem
Your self-esteem is a very important factor in your life. The way you see and carry yourself controls the way you present yourself to the world, how you walk into a room, and how you address your problems. Low self-esteem causes negative emotions like resentment, aggression, or indifference, and in order for those feelings to go, you have to indulge in activities that build self-esteem.
Prioritizing your self-esteem is necessary because it gives you healthy self-esteem, which increases your sense of self-worth. It helps you to appreciate and accept yourself, no matter what you go through. When you put yourself first, you learn how to build healthy relationships with people, persevere after setbacks, and feel good about yourself in the process.
Can You Train Your Self-Esteem?
There are a lot of things that can affect your self-esteem, it could be:
- Health status
- Physical appearance
- Life experiences like bullying
- Type of neighborhood you live in
- People around you
- Distant Parenting
- Social media addiction
Low self-esteem comes with negative thinking and behaviors that mask how you see the world. Sadly, You believe that every negative situation you find yourself in is your fault. These thoughts are based on your experience, so they can be changed.
Boosting self-esteem means challenging and changing those negative thoughts to positive ones. Research proves that self-esteem can be trained. There are a lot of approaches that are effective in helping you. First, you need to take note of those negative thoughts about yourself. Then, You can write them down, pick them one by one, and do the exact opposite of what the paper says. But, you should bear in mind that it is a gradual process. Sometimes you might fall back, but as long as you are prepared to make an effort, it will work out.
7 Ways to Improve Your Self-Esteem
After deciding to work on your self-esteem, then comes the actual work. Here, we are going to discuss some activities that you can do to build your self-esteem:
1. Monitor Critical Self-Talk:
There is a voice in our heads that we sometimes converse with. Now that voice is controlled by what we feed it, be it negative or positive emotions. If you are used to viewing things from a negative perspective, the voice will always be negative, bringing down your confidence and morale. You can start by being mindful of what you tell yourself because if those thoughts are constant, they become beliefs, which will negatively impact your self-esteem.
You can try reading positive books or practicing daily affirmations. Affirmations are positive statements concerning yourself. You could voice them out in front of a mirror or write them down. At first, you might not believe it, but as time goes on, the narrative will change.
2. Be aware of Self-Comparison:
No one is thoroughly perfect in this world. There are areas in your life where people are thriving, yet you are found wanting. Do not compare yourself with other people. We are all built differently and as such, we have different paces in growth, skill, development, knowledge, etc. If someone achieves something you have been aiming for, instead of comparing yourself to others in a degrading manner, you can take it as a guide or a challenge.
3. Be mindful of the people In your circle:
There is an impact on the type of people you mingle with in your life. If you spend time with people who bring you down, your self-esteem will suffer. It is necessary to assess the types of people you let into your space and to know when to cut off toxic relationships. Your mental wellbeing is important and no one should mess with it.
4. Perform the act of self-care and self-compassion:
Take care of yourself, and be patient with yourself. Building your self-esteem does not happen overnight, it will take a lot of practice, so you need to perform random acts of self-care, It is good for the mind and body. When you wake up each morning, find something good about yourself and compliment it, Eat good and nutritious food. These are acts of self-care, and they are activities that build self-esteem too.
5. Stop disregarding compliments
Many people with low self-esteem have a hard time accepting compliments from others. You are told “Your food tastes delicious” and your reply is “I doubt that, it has an aftertaste I don’t like”. What you should have said is thank you. You don’t believe or want to accept that you are capable of doing something that good, so you shoot yourself in the leg. That should stop. Learn how to accept compliments for what they are: positive feedback about yourself and your skills.
6. Set goals and try to achieve them:
Another way to boost your self-esteem is to show yourself that you are capable of reaching your goals. Find something you enjoy doing or are interested in and try to get better at it. Whenever you reach that goal, clap for yourself for doing a good job. It will do wonders for your self-esteem. Remember, your goals should be rational and achievable. They should mean something to you, it will have more impact and help in personal growth.
7. Journaling:
Writing helps you to clear your mind and understand yourself better. Keeping a journal is a booster because it helps you to see the positive outcomes in your life. At the end of your day, you can pick your journal and write about the things that happened that day. You can also have a gratitude journal to write down things you are grateful for. You must not fill a whole page from the start. It can be one line, but it is really helpful and can relieve stress.
Ways to Improve Self-Esteem in Your Children
Children are more sensitive, and as they are still young, they are learning about themselves. At that young age, it is important to instill healthy self-esteem traits in your child. This will help the child navigate through life. Here are some activities that build self-esteem in your children:
1. Show unconditional love and support:
Your child needs to know that you love him/her. Don’t assume that because you give them the basic amenities that they are aware of. Use words and actions, tell them while saying goodbye, hug them, and give them daily affirmations. When they feel assured that you love them and will always support them, it boosts their confidence.
2. Let them fail:
This might sound unrealistic, but it is one important lesson in your child’s life. They need to know that things do not always work out and that is okay. It does not make them failures or incapable. Allowing them to experience this will help them learn more and gather experience, which will help them when they grow up and face similar situations. If you don’t do this, they might become codependent on people.
3. Praise their efforts:
Children are sensitive beings and they take every word you say to heart. They need to know that you see and acknowledge the efforts that they put into completing a task. It’s not always about the results because sometimes they might fail even after trying hard. It would help if you said things like “Well done, I saw the way you chased that ball today, you are strong and I know you’ll score the goal next time”. This will boost the child’s morale and make them know that you are paying attention.
4. Do not insult your children:
Now, you see this can destroy a child’s self-esteem and confidence. When a child hear “You are lazy” or “You are a dullard” from their parent who they look up to, it makes them feel like those words are true and they are incapable. Badmouthing a child is not a way to bring them up, it does not make them stronger.
5. Help them to focus/ build on their strengths:
As children grow up, there are a lot of things to learn out there. Observe your children, figure out their interests, and help them grow. It will help the child to understand and learn more about themselves. This will also give them a sound footing in any area of their choice.
6. Allow your child to take healthy risks:
Definitely, one of your basic instincts as parents is to protect your child against all danger. But, for the child to build confidence he/she needs to take chances and take responsibility for actions. You need to force yourself to stand back and let them make decisions for themselves. Letting your child take those healthy risks will help them when they grow up and have to make tough decisions.
5 Self-Esteem Activities for Teens in Middle School or High School
Teenagehood is a tricky phase because you go through a lot of changes, especially physical changes. Most of the time, these changes can mess with your confidence. Here are some activities that build self-esteem for teens in middle school.
1. Use Affirmations:
As many times as I may repeat this, it can not be overemphasized. Affirmations help you to build a type of confidence that can take you anywhere you want to go. When you speak positive things about yourself constantly it is hard to break that sort of confidence. You could write it down and say it like a prayer (morning and night).
2. Set meaningful goals:
Setting meaningful goals is a self-esteem boost. It gives you a sense of purpose and creates this buzz of excitement & anticipation. Remember the goal has to be achievable. Students can write down the goal they want to achieve for the week, it could be from a task. Also, They should write down the potential obstacles and the plan that they will use to achieve them. Then, When they write it down, it should be pinned so they can see it daily. Always keep a record of your progress and Make sure to celebrate yourself when you achieve the set goals.
3. Mental health check-in:
At this age, as the students go through a lot of changes they will experience different new emotions and may be unwilling to talk about their feelings. Teachers can bring out a time for this opportunity and create a space for the students to talk about their feelings, or an online form for mental health evaluation and check.
4. Indulging in physical activity:
Locomotive activities have a way of building one’s confidence and esteem. Additionally, It also teaches you that winning and losing is a part of life. You can join a club in school or volunteer in community service. It teaches you hard work and self-discipline and also instills good ethics in you.
5. Seeking Support from people who care about you:
Seeking support is an activity that can help you improve your self-esteem by connecting with people who care about your well-being, understand you, and respect you. These people can be your family, friends, teachers, counselors, mentors, or anyone else who makes you feel comfortable. Seeking support does not mean that you are weak or dependent.
It means that you are brave enough to ask for help when you need it. Also, it means that you are willing to offer help to others when they need it, which is a sign of strength and maturity. Seeking support can help you boost your self-esteem by making you feel loved, supported, and understood. It can also help you grow as a person and learn from others’ experiences.
Self-Esteem Therapy Activities for Adults
1. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy:
CBT is a type of behavioral therapy that focuses on how thoughts and behaviors affect how someone feels in a particular scenario. It helps to remove the negative learning processes, we might have picked and input positive ones that are beneficial to the client. Cognitive elements sustain self-esteem, therefore making it better suited for boosting self-esteem. CBT is popularly known for the successful treatment of numerous psychological conditions.
2. Humanistic/Client-centered Counseling:
This type of therapy is based on the belief that people already have the traits necessary to thrive. They use the person’s curiosity, intelligence, imaginative thinking, and compassion to help the client achieve their goal. The therapist fixes on those traits and gives the client activities that will need the use of those traits. This sort of therapy has shown results in improving psychological functioning.
3. Mindfulness-based counseling:
Mindful-based counseling is a type of therapy that relaxes the mind through meditation. During relaxation, the negative opinions we might have about ourselves are reduced, thus helping to boost our self-esteem. It is most effective for dealing with emotional issues.
4. Rational Emotive Therapy:
This therapy was created by a psychologist named Albert Ellis. It focuses on the client’s belief about a situation and not the situation itself. The therapist helps the client to analyze their cognitive assessment of how the situation may have brought an outcome. In essence, it makes you understand that the way you view events matters and not the event itself. It is a direct method that is beneficial in treatment and it helps to promote self-esteem.
5. Narrative Therapy:
In this therapy, counselors have to work alongside clients to examine how the stories we tell ourselves influence our thoughts and actions. The therapist guides the clients to rewrite those tales about themselves, especially when they harm them. For example, If you believe that you are not enough because of a certain situation, the therapist will guide you to re-access the situation and change your thoughts. Narrative therapy helps lower self-stigma and raise self-esteem.
Fun Games/Activities That Build Self-Esteem
- Catch the compliment: It is a game that can be played with at least 3 people. Firstly, the players stand/sit in a circle while one person holds the ball. Then, he or she will randomly throw the ball to a random person among them and say a compliment about a catcher.
- Scavenger Hunt: Participants find 3 objects and place them in front of them. Now, each person will make up a story about their neighbor’s tools and not their own, it increases thinking capacity, and participants will have fun. It also helps remove an inferiority complex and brings confidence.
- Rolling in admiration: Here, a die is rolled, and the person who rolls the die has to compliment his/her neighbor by the number on the dice.
- Strong Suit Tower of Self-Esteem: In this game, children team up to build a tower. The game involves answering different question cards that bring out the strengths of each player.
- Totiko, a self-esteem game: It is a wood-stacked game like Jenga. The woods come in different colors and they have their question cards. The questions are designed in a way that builds self-esteem. Also, it helps you learn more about yourself and build your confidence.
Conclusion
In conclusion, self-esteem is a crucial factor that affects our mental and emotional well-being. It shapes how we perceive ourselves, interact with others, and deal with difficulties. Therefore, it is important to cultivate a healthy and positive self-esteem that reflects our true value and potential.
There are various activities that can help us enhance our self-esteem, such as practicing affirmations, setting goals, expressing gratitude, pursuing passions, seeking support, and giving back. These activities can help us recognize our strengths, appreciate our uniqueness, and overcome our limitations. By doing so, we can improve our self-image, boost our confidence, and increase our happiness. Remember, you are worthy, capable, and deserving of love and respect. You have the power to create a better version of yourself.
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